As the Phillies go for their second clean sweep in a row, we’d be remiss to ignore the hallowed ground they walk: American Family Field.
I am just kidding. Although the naming rights for Miller Park expired in 2020, and their rebrand couldn’t be more juxtaposing, Milwaukee still belongs to beer.
So it’s no surprise that PSN’s own Zach Ciavolella had suds on the brain.
And look who responded, the meanest beer drinking in all of Philadelphia, John Kruk:
That got us thinking – what if your favorite Phillies were beers?
So the PSN crew put together their picks. Let us know how we did and be brutal; we all know how divisive beer drinking can get.
|Philly Favorite||Beer Selection||Type of Beer||Rationale||Brew Master|
|Kyle Schwarber||Victory Golden Monkey||Belgian Triple||A strong Philly beer for a strong new Philly boy. Schwarber has been here less than half a year but feels Philly as Philly could be. Golden Monkey, a 9.5% beer, accurately represents the pure power of a SCHWARBOMB.||Alec Kostival|
|Aaron Nola||Yuengling||Idk beer lol||Classic Philly staple for a homegrown rotation staple.||Shaun Nestor|
|J.T. Realmuto||Shiner Bock||Bock Lager||From Del City to DelCo, he’s one helluva ‘bock’stop.||Tommy Orme|
|Seranthony Dominguez||Evil Genius Stacy’s Mom||American IPA||Stacy’s Mom by Evil Genius is a delicious citrusy IPA. 7.5% alc will sneak up on you just like Seranthony Dominguez has snuck a 1.74 ERA past everyone. Stacy’s Mom is my go-to beer. Seranthony should be Thomson’s go-to reliever. Both are my personal favorite of the beer and bullpen worlds, respectively.||Alec Kostival|
|James Norwood||Hamms||Terrible||He’s still on the team but objectively the worst player there. Norwood has been designated to clean up duty yet still has a 7.63 ERA. He’s Hamms, the worst beer I’ve ever had. Possibly a hot take.||Alec Kostival|
|Corey Knebel||Bud heavy||Lager||An American lager for a Texas-born American ball player. Sometimes at the end of the night, you just need to end the night on a high note with a couple of classic Buds. But sometimes, you walk to the fridge one too many times, and you’re destined to have a bad time. There’s a fine line between a nightcap and a horrible morning when drinking Bud heavy’s, and the same goes for watching Knebel.||Kyle Fisher|
|Bryson Stott||Victory Berry Monkey||Triple Sour||It’s one of the newest beers from Victory Brewing Company. Bryson Stott is one of the newest Phillies. Just like Stott’s 3-run walk-off, Berry Monkey has shown great potential. Stott/Berry Monkey could be the rookie/ beer of the summer. This sweet-sour will surprise you with 9.5% alc. Stott will surprise you now that he has a real opportunity.||Alec Kostival|
|Bryce Harper||Heineken 0.0||Non-alcoholic||Why would this beautiful man poison his body with beer? Simple – he wouldn’t.||Tommy Orme|
|Nick Castellanos||Corona Extra||Beach Lager||This man already looks like he walked right off the beaches of South Jersey. Let’s give him the most elite beer to enjoy in some sunshine.||Tommy Orme|
AP Photo/Ashley Landis